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Saturday, July 21, 2007

Rape by Stranger











Chronicles of Rape-Survivor’s Stories


(Part II of VI)

The premise: No man of good conscience would willingly and recklessly force himself upon another person for reasons of sex, power or control. This series is intended to raise awareness and sensitivity.

(I have been asked to present these two accounts verbatim. I have materially done that).

At Home:

“I live alone as a single woman. I was always careful for my security. During the day my doors remained locked, whether I was in or out, and at night my curtains and shutters remained closed.

“On that particular night I went to bed as usual, but about 1:30am I was awakened not by sound, but rather by a bad feeling and the smell of garlic. Before I could gather my senses he pounced upon me and clamped a hand over my mouth. “Be still and don’t make a sound or I will kill you!” he whispered.

“Later the police explained how he had gained entry to my house, but I don’t want to describe the method here, lest I give others ideas. However, anyone who is concerned for their security should request an assessment of your situation from a professional as a priority, especially women living alone.

“ From the moment he fell on me my entire body went limp and icy cold. I simply accepted that this was the end, my life would be over in a moment. What a shame I had to suffer the ultimate in degradation before the end came. No point in fighting it. The beast on top of me would have his way and then he would snap my neck and no more pain and suffering.

“I then had an out of body experience as the violation took place, not really feeling anything except my body jerking, being pushed and pulled. However, his breath smelled of stale garlic that caused me to projectile vomit over him. Later, this would prove to be important.

“Suddenly it was over and he made ready to go. I actually called out weakly from the bed, “please don’t go. Please don’t leave me like this. Finish it! Please, kill me. Please!”

“The real horror I experience every day. I have died at least a thousand times. There are times when I curl up in a ball and cry so hard while holding a kitchen knife. I constantly demand an answer from God as to Why Me? How could You let him do that to Me?

The smell of garlic sets off in me the most distressing panic attack.”

In the Park during daylight:

“I adored the outdoors. To take long walks in the forest and the mountains was my favourite pastime. Perhaps my mistake was my predictability, or maybe it was just by chance. On that fine autumn day the unthinkable happened and I was not even remotely prepared.

“ I was out early and in my stride, looking for new birds to spot when through my binoculars I spotted a man who evidently was taking notice of me. And then a movement to my left revealed a second man, and he was laughing.

“Instantly I knew I was in trouble. Why the hell had I come up here on my own and without my mobile phone? I didn’t want to be bothered by anyone, of course. Well, they were coming for me and I panicked. I thought I knew the area, but in my fright I became disoriented and quite lost. They on the other hand, seemed to be having a great time toying with me. I was the prey and they were the hunters.

“I ran as fast as I could go, and I fell many times, and eventually they caught up with me. For what must have been more than three hours they took turns, having stripped me of my clothes and laid me out on a large boulder with my arms and legs tied. I was kidnapped and raped repeatedly, and when they became bored they asked me how would I like for them to kill me.

“The only reason I survived is the sudden appearance of the forest ranger helicopter on routine patrol. The sight that greeted them set off in motion one of the biggest manhunts that my country has ever seen. They were tried and convicted and sentenced to prison for the rest of their natural lives – no chance of parole.

“I too am serving a life sentence. I cannot leave my house except in the company of others. I have grown fat due to the lack of exercise. There has not been a day that has passed without me re-living the experience over and over again.

“How do I make it stop?”


Next: “Rape within Marriage.”


Copyright © 2007 Eugene Carmichael