The Science of Shopping

It's a Girl Thing!

As a man this title will probably confuse you. In the world of shopping men and women display attitudes from different planets, as suggested by the popular book.

I have spent three weeks surrounded by four women as they went shopping and I have had my awareness sharpened. Let me tell you how I shop and you will get a fairly good idea from that, especially if you are a woman, of how we men deal with the task when it is absolutely necessary.

Say, I need a new suit. For me this would equate to buying a house, so some time must be spent on the details. Because I’m not a rich man my suits will come from off the rack. Before arriving at the shop I will decide on the colour and style, so when I get to the shop I go directly to that rack and find my size. All that is left is for me to have the leg size taken and to pay for it. If I’m in the shop for more than ten minutes it’s because the salesman was busy with another customer when I went in.

The experience of shopping for a woman is different to that. No matter whether they are shopping for something small, or, heaven forbid, something major, they put the same effort into the process. On one day we went into a shopping mall and the ladies all went into a particular shop. They were in there for the best part of an hour and came out with a very small inconsequential package. In the history of men that has never happened.

When shopping for Spanish style fans it was fascinating to observe how every fan displayed was touched, opened, waved a few times, looked over on both sides, fondly caressed, held up to the face, and looked at in the mirror.

I once bought a dozen fans to take as gifts. I went into the store and said I’ll take one of each, (which is how I know they had a dozen different styles), paid for them and left. Whole thing took a little less than two minutes.

Can someone please tell me what is it about women and shoes? We tried to walk down a street and they spotted every shoe store, whether it was on the side that we were walking or the other side. I would continue on walking, totally oblivious and when I looked they were like deer caught in the glow of my headlights.

Imelda Marcos, the wife of a dictator was discovered to have a closet with so many pairs of shoes that all we men scoffed, and every woman said “lucky bitch!” I should be careful how I touch on this subject however, because I have managed to build up a collection myself of far too many shoes. My excuse is that I am looking for a pair of shoes that don’t make my feet hurt, when the problem all along is my feet.

I like the company of women, but I have discovered that if I’m in their company whether they are on a shopping trip or not, I need to have plenty of patience. In case you didn’t know, shopkeepers, if they are wise, will provide comfortable chairs placed throughout their stores. Those are man-chairs where us guys get to sit down and shut up.




The other thing you might not have noticed is that each mall has 99% shops where women are the target customers, and even if they have a men’s department it will be tiny by comparison. However, hardware stores are an entirely different concept and don’t count in this study.

Finally, there was the time when my wife and I were looking to buy a house. I had more time to scout around, but every suggestion I came up with was rejected. One of the objections was that we were too far removed from the metro station. So, I got fed up and gave my wife my power of attorney and told her to but us a house. I didn’t want to be consulted, nor did I want to see it before she had signed the papers.

Is the house that she bought perfect in every way. Yes, and No! Am I content with it? Yes, actually!



Copyright © 2009 Eugene Carmichael

The Professor and the Police

A Very Good Friend to Have!

Topic “A” this week is that unfortunate incident in Cambridge, Mass, in the United States which blew way out of proportion. To summarise, the police were called to attend what a member of the public thought was a possible break-in in progress at the home of a Harvard professor. In fact, what the witness saw was the professor trying to force open the door to his own home, as the door had become stuck. The professor is black and the police officer who attended is white.

What appears to have happened is that the officer approached the professor as a suspect, and the professor became outraged and saw things that simply were not there.Fundamentally, this was a most unfortunate incident, and past events formed the basis of a bad reaction.

America’s history involving black men and white officers, and even some black officers is very bad. Perhaps even now black professionals find themselves being stopped and harassed if they are driving top of the line cars, just because they are vulnerable. There is a lot of resentment that goes back over many years. If you are a black man going about your business carrying a music case and it’s late at night, the police may well stop you and demand an impromptu mini concert to satisfy themselves that you are a musician on your way home from a gig.

Professionals resent it; and the common man resents being profiled as a possible wrong doer without any basis other than his colour. The Harvard professor had no idea that a call had been made, so he apparently thought that this white officer had taken it into his head to rough him up, for fun. He reacted, as I might have reacted myself. I would have been wrong, and I think that the professor was wrong.

Here we had a distinguished man who had worked hard and who deserved to be respected. But, he was being treated like a common criminal, and I imagine he thought, “How dare you! Don’t you know who I am? I am a respected professional and I will not allow you to treat me in this manner!” And it appears that everything that the officer said only added fuel to that fire, to the point where the officer felt that as a police officer he would not stand for a member of the public treating him and his office in a disrespectful manner.

So the stage was set for a disaster. Two bull-headed men determined not to blink. So, after warnings that went unheeded he arrested the professor for at least disorderly conduct.

I understand the motives of both men and sympathise with them both. The professor was standing up for the dignity of all black men, and the officer was simply trying to do his job under very trying circumstances.

What a mess, you might be prepared to say. Yeah, a real mess, but it gets messier. The professor is a personal friend of the President of The United States, and when the lopsided story got to him he stood before the cameras and opined that the Cambridge police had “acted stupidly.” The entire world sucked in its breath because we could see that the man who chooses his words wisely had put his foot firmly in the muck up to his ankles.
I understand his emotions but why he would have chosen to speak on a matter of local law is beyond me. President Barak Obama took the sucker punch and his supporters around the world could not believe it. He is, after all, a human, not necessarily a Superman. However, having realised his mistake once he calmed down has tried to correct his faux pas by making a statement that says, in so many words, the he used an unfortunate choice of words, and he phoned the officer and they chatted, and he confirmed that he believes that the officer is a good man. He said that he now believes that both men over-reacted during the incident, and that he did not intend to malign the police department.

Good!

Now I hope that the professor has also calmed down and can see the officer’s point of view, and can accept that in the line of police work black men will arrest white men, and vice versa, and the same thing for women who will arrest both men and women, and it need not necessarily be anything other than law enforcement in progress.

Unfortunately, there are still those rogue cops out there who give policing in America a bad name. I hope that this acts as a wake-up call to such prehistoric creatures that the days of harassment of black men for fun are over. It has been an embarrassment to all the players involved, but if the message gets through to those who need to hear it, that would be a good thing.


Copyright © 2009 Eugene Carmichael

What Sort of Crime is This?

Man's Inhumanity to Man taken to a new an Frightening Low!

There is a case currently before the courts that I would like to write about, but I have to be careful as the matter being sub-judice, my words might influence the justices. The essential facts being alleged are as follows: A man and his female passenger while driving came upon a young motorcyclist lying in the road after having been involved in an accident with another car. Accidentally, they drove over the man and immediately stopped. At this point, I doubt that the suspects have committed any offence. What has happened to the motorcyclist is very tragic, but I think that none of the blame for anything that has happened can be put on the suspects.

Many things take place in the course of the driving day that are peculiar. We can only avoid becoming involved in tragedies if we are vigilant and if we anticipate what could happen, so in order to try to avoid them happening. For instance, many people drive as though they are the only people using the road. That is the completely incorrect assumption, of course, so it is our responsibility to be in the correct position in the road at all times. The other thing that is in our own interests is to choose a speed at which to travel that is safe and comfortable.

Continuing with the story: our suspects are in a situation in which any driver might find himself. We have come upon a young accident victim lying in the road and we have been unable to avoid running over him. We have stopped with the young man trapped under our car. This is horrible! What should we do next? I hear you say get out of the car and give as much help as you can. That makes sense to me, and is mandated by law, especially to drivers and their passengers who are involved in an accident.

It is alleged that the suspects in this case did not do that. Instead, they drove off, dragging the man, and it had to be obvious to them that he was being dragged. It is further alleged that they drove on for two kilometres with the body still attached to their car. At the end of the two kilometres, according to an eyewitness, they turned off the main road onto a side road, and inside that side road the car was driven backwards and forwards until the body became disentangled

The suspects deny that any of these things happened involving them, but the driver is charged with murder, and his passenger is charged with failing to give assistance to the victim. It seems that eye witness reports and cctv cameras do place them where they don’t want to be placed.

So, if the facts are as the prosecution allege, I have three questions: Why? Why? And Why?

Why would a driver, finding himself in the predicament of having collided with a person in the road, and now stopped, drive off instead of getting out of his car to offer assistance?

It might be because he had no driver’s license and insurance; or was drunk; or was carrying something in his car that would cause great difficulty.



Why drive on dragging a person, who, it is alleged, had life in him?

This is the one question that no one else other than the driver can answer, if he knows. I can believe that his passenger is as horrified as I am, and judging by the body language of the photo taken of the two of them in court, (he is sitting at one end of a bench, and she is at the other), he cannot expect much help from her.

Finally, why, after dragging a man’s body for two kilometres could a person be so heartless as to drive his car backwards and forwards until the body became dislodged and then drive away? This is a statement of man’s inhumanity that makes me very uncomfortable. I know that in war times, particularly involving the nazis, some things were done that are simply impossible to believe, and I find it beyond my own comprehension that I, or anyone whom I know, could stoop so low.

So, I end this with another question: What crime has actually been committed? Prosecutors have charged this man with murder, but that seems to me to not properly reflect the gravity of the crime. No one else should feel free to do the same thing because they will be free again after serving a few years behind bars. The judge in the case, if finding the man guilty as charged, should be able to throw the whole book at him. Most importantly the family of the young man must gain the satisfaction of believing that justice has been properly served.

I have a son about his age who rides a motorcycle. Were I in the shoes of that most unfortunate family, it would take a whole lot more than the standard sentence for murder to convince me that justice was well and truly done. Of that you can be sure!

Copyright © 2009 Eugene Carmichael

Family Visits

Family


I will state right up front that this will be a very short blog. The title will give a clue as to why that is. I presently have family visiting us from Bermuda, and I’m as excited as can be that we are all together under one roof.

I have read from many people of family and friends who come to call, and there can be problems adjusting. However, when there has been a long time between visits, or as in my case it’s the first ever visit since we have been here, the value is beyond computation.

We have been here ten years and we have been talking about this visit all along, however, there have been some serious terrorist activities, two wars involving America and to some extent Europe, and a very weak euro. I have been back to Bermuda a couple of times and it was good to be with everyone. Now I get the chance to show my family “my Spain”, and they get to see what is keeping me here. Strictly speaking, a weak dollar with which we have been living is telling us to quit the euro zone, and I know that we should. There is quality of life here that we are unwilling to part with so we live from day-to-day.

We are in the midst of fiesta time and there is so much to partake of, so I am busying myself with being tour guide and putting all my knowledge and experience to good use. So, that is just what I will do, but I promise to write a blog detailing the virtue of family together in peace, harmony and enjoying life to the full.

Stay tuned!

Copyright © 2009 Eugene Carmichael

Goodbye! Michael Jackson

Goodbye! MJ
One of a Kind!

First, there was the announcement that Michael Jackson had died of a heart attack. Fans around the world said I don’t believe that. Surely that’s a publicity stunt ahead of his big concert series!

Then we saw what appeared to be his body wrapped in a body bag being taken from his home in California. Fans said that they didn’t see any body. How were they supposed to know who, if anyone was wrapped in that bag. It was all just part of the stunt, they said.

Then it was reported that there had been conducted two autopsies on his body. Fans said, remember Thriller. This will be bigger than Thriller when Michael walks out with a massive posse behind him.

Then there was a reading of his Will before he had even been interred. What’s wrong with these people, have they no dignity or shame? They said that he had left his father out of his will. In other words he did not give any of his debts to his dad. That was decent of him. Something that is supposed to be private has been splashed around the world. Fundamentally, what Michael has said is “Being of sound mind and body, I’ve spent all my money, and a lot of yours as well.!” Good on yer Mike!

Then came the funeral and the internment, and Michael didn’t get up from the coffin with “Thriller II” playing in the background, and fans said, You know what, even for Michael this would have been one off the wall, over the top, way, way out there publicity stunt. We had better believe that physical Michael has gone on to do a gig on the Big Stage in the sky.

So, it’s time to face the facts and let go. We will always have his music to play when we wish, and we can choose to remember him as we would like to. It can now be seen clearly that he was unique. No one like him, no one equal to him. This is life happening, and sometimes life sucks. But, it’s real and not even someone as big as Michael could beat that system.

Now comes the contest between Elvis and Michael to see who can sell the most memorablia while being "retired".

So, Rest In Peace Michael, and thanks for the memories!

Copyright © 2009 Eugene Carmichael

MJ. Super Nova Star

Michael Jackson

The King of Pop is Dead

Long Live the King!

Topic “A” this week is not the hundreds of people being blown to bits in Afganistán and Iraq, nor is it the many local conflicts in Africa or the millions of starving people around the world who are dying from malnutrition and other illnesses. It’s not even Silvio Berlosconi’s alleged scandals, or the matter of toxic assets. Lost jobs, lost homes, lost businesses, lost futures, lost educations have all been relegated to Topic “B”.

Topic “A” is simply one thing, The Death, the untimely and unexpected death of Michael Jackson. For the media Christmas came early. Editors everywhere worth their salt greeted the news of this event with one word: “WOW!” All vacations have been suspended, and staffs have been called in to work overtime. This is BIG!

MJ’s brother struggled to make an announcement that he ended with a plea to the media to please respect the family’s privacy. He certainly wasn’t trying to be funny, but I was amused because the one thing that the media won’t do is that.

MJ was 50 at the time of his sudden and untimely death. In the words of one of his own songs, he was taken away from us “Too Soon.” Now, we who write have been left with the almost impossible task of choosing something to say about him. There is simply so much material available, so I will begin by saying that I have been thoroughly entertained, or horrified by MJ, but never bored.

Love him or hate him, the one thing that is incontestable is that the world has seldom seen such pure and unfettered talent. In looking at videos of his performances with a critical eye we see moves so fluid and hear sounds so original that place him in the state of being a pioneer. Many people have tried to emulate him, but always they come up short. The original is the original and stands alone.

Here my mind begins to go off in separate directions all at once and that tells me to make a very long story as short as possible. I would need to write several books to capture the complete essence of the man because he was so many personalities.

I must say that I was as shocked and surprised as the rest of the world over his sudden passing. However, try as hard as I can I cannot see MJ as a grandfather. I should not be surprised. In the galaxy of stars it is the Super Nova that shines the brightest, but its life is short lived. It explodes with its coming, burns the brightest during its existence, and then its gone in a flash. I think this is an adequate description of MJ. Long after he’s physically left us he will be talked about and revered. In reality his physical presence here on earth was pre-determined to be short.

Now that he has taken his bow and left the building I would like to add my voice to the growing chorus that says: “ MJ, thanks so much for the superb entertainment and the memories. You provided my own life with such a rich soundtrack, and I choose to remember you fondly.”

His greatest performance could be yet to come on the occasion of his funeral. Strictly speaking it should be a private affair, but the Jackson family may decide to open it up to the public, who after all are as much his family. In any event, somehow I think this will be the funeral of the century.
This will be something to see. In MJ’s own words, “This is IT!”

Copyright © 2009 Eugene Carmichael

The Relative Lottery

Lady Luck's balls


This past week a 73 year-old man and his wife won twenty-five million pounds in the U.K. Lottery. I´m happy for them but why couldn’t they have won that when they were twenty-five? He said that they have no intention of letting it change their lives in any way, which leaves me wondering why they played in the first place.

In these times of economic crisis to win a lot of money must surely have even more significance than normal. At least for these two people they need never have to worry again about paying their bills or outliving their money. Now they only have to worry about losing interest and capital loss as the world around them goes to hell in a handbasket.

Can you win millions of any currency and not be affected by it to the extent that you continue to live your life the old way? Apparently, the man has a gardening allotment in a community of DIY gardeners, and after discovering his good fortune on Saturday he still went to his allotment on Sunday, as usual, so perhaps he has a bit of a chance.

I was thinking of myself under similar circumstances. Having received the news the question would be: would I retire instantly? Well, I’m already retired. Would I buy another car? I already have two, and my wife has one. Furthermore, one of my cars is a Jaguar XJ6 Sovereign. How many bleeding cars do I need? Would I open a business? Why? For Heaven’s sake, I’m already retired. Would I buy another house? I already have two.
Relatively speaking, I’m already living the life of a lottery winner. Everything is relative, and a life without too many worries is a very good thing indeed.

How would I allow that much money to change my life? Firstly, my wife could hang up her gloves and become one of the ladies who lunch. Secondly, we would no doubt buy a dream house somewhere in the world, although we do love our present home. There are some ways in which it could be improved, mainly by getting rid of some of our horrible neighbours from hell.

I would love to have the freedom from worry about future income, but when you suddenly come into that type of money you take on a different form of money worry and stress.

This is an interesting exercise for me because the facts are that my life is just lovely as it is. Perhaps it could use just a little more of a cushion but should I win big on the lottery it will be for other peoples benefit. Firstly, my son could be given a really great start in life with some form of career and creature comforts. Only problem is that he insists on his own independence and doing things his own way.

Both my mature daughters are doing well, although I’m sure they wouldn’t mind having a bit of a cushion to fall back on. My grandchildren, and my great granddaughter would have a better shot at a future if their grand dad had some extra bucks to lay on them, and that would be good. My sisters and brothers would be up high on my list of people with whom to share my good fortune with. After that, I have a whole village in Cameroon called Gouria to whom I am dedicated in improving their lot in life, so I wouldn’t have to look very far for things to finance.

Well, I seem to have the perfect profile of someone who deserves to win the lottery in a very big way. So, I’ll just keep on playing and we’ll just have to wait and see what comes of that.

Wish me luck!

Copyright © 2009 Eugene Carmichael

Fear of Flying!

Catching the Bus!

If you suffer the fear of flying nothing that I am going to say is likely to cure you. We have all shared the story of something that was not supposed to happen with Air France flight 447. The Airbus is a very robust aircraft that was simply thought impossible to be brought down by simple weather. In a sense it’s almost like a replay of the Titanic.

It was made even more dramatic by the fact that the flight had vanished hours before the public became aware of the tragedy. At Paris they were being told that its arrival was delayed. How horrible for them to then discover the awful truth in little instalments.

So if you are someone who has a fear of flying, all of these events have done nothing to ease your fears. In fact, I suspect that a lot of confident people are badly shaken. Professionals who coach people into a state of being at ease about flying do a wonderful job, principally because they talk all around the topic without cutting to the chase. I am going to take a different course and be blunt. Being blunt is how I deal with the uncertainty, and it does work for me as well as it might.

Life is one gigantic gamble. There are no real guarantees. Companies that give them, and governments that make them find that their guarantees dissolve the minute that they do. Life is about risk with the only certainty being that we live, and then we will die. In the meantime there are plenty of times when we must trust our very lives to others.

When we require a medical operation we trust that the operating team will get it right and that we will survive. Such a chance can be thrust upon us as a matter of life or death. It’s all about the risk to reward equation. We may be silly to take the risk of dying under sedation for something minor or selective.

Another time in our lives when we place our lives in the care of a stranger is when we hail a taxi, or take a bus, or simply ride with a friend. Control of the vehicle is in the hands of someone else, and our lives depend upon their skill and judgement. However, I am unaware of something called Fear of Travelling by bus or train or friend. But, there could be classes for people affected by such situations.

In some countries, a simple trip out to the market might be the last thing that you do as there are suicide bombers about. Even going to church could be where your life will end. At least with regard to flying, security measures are quite stringent to keep that form of travelling fairly safe.

When you drive or ride your own vehicle you run the risk of doing something silly yourself that ends in a collision that takes your life, or just being on the road opens you up to the risk of actions by others.

So, the bottom line is this: it is natural to want to live and to avoid situations that place our lives in peril, but the simple fact is that it is not possible to avoid all such risk. There are people who do not leave their own hometown because they won’t fly, yet they are at even greater risk in the everyday things that they do. When it is my time to die, I will die. I might be in an airplane, or on a ship, a bus, in my car or in my bed, but I will come to the end. The only question is whether I die alone or together with a bunch of strangers. I’m not suggesting that I will be happy about it, or even stoic.
What I will not do is die more than once. I am concerned for people who die a small death every time they take a risk. They must suffer such terrible stress over something they cannot totally avoid. My philosophy is to do the opposite and to live life to the full until the day that my life comes to an abrupt halt. Then that will be that.

I don’t save anything for a special occasion; I use the special dishes and cutlery; there’s not too much in my savings account; I own two cars and a motorcycle; and I live each day as though it were my last.

By-the-way, if it’s of any comfort, travel by regularly scheduled aircraft is still the safest method of all. Now, if only they could do something about all the other things that make airline travel such a pain in the ass.

Copyright © 2009 Eugene Carmichael

It’s All an Illusion

It's Magic!

The current worldwide economic crisis is affecting my generation to a greater extent than young people. We are all frightened of what is coming next, but my generation are truly shell shocked because at a time when we need to be able to rely on things that we’ve known all our lives to see us through to the grave, suddenly the sky is falling all around us.

The scope of the problem is so huge that I think in order to try and understand just how overwhelming we have to take one case at a time. We should use as an example a family that have been conservative all their lives. The breadwinner worked at one job throughout his entire life. He was loyal, never missed a day, was seen as a pillar of the company, and as a reflection of his faith and trust he bought the company shares that were offered him as a place of safekeeping for his savings that was for the retirement of he and his wife.

He might have been an employee of 152 year-old Lehman Bros, or any number of other firms of that nature that were household names. Just when he lay back to put up his feet and to enjoy his gold watch the absolutely unthinkable happened: Lehman Bros. disappeared from view as though it never existed. His savings has gone and he has no way of recovering. Unless he was wise and spread his risk that family will probably simply die of broken hearts and broken dreams. They will simply show up in the death notices as mature people who have simply come to the end of their lives. No drama!

More and more so I am seeing the landscape change in front of my eyes. I am sitting down to write this as the television talking heads are describing in detail the ramifications of the bankruptcy of General Motors that was filed today. This follows the bankruptcy of Chrysler motors. In effect, America has gone from being the most powerful economy in the world to being the beggar on the street in about ten years.

There was a time when the U.S. Dollar was the currency that everyone wanted and respected. Today, people are seriously talking about changing the dollar as a reserve currency to the euro. When the OPEC nations elect to price fuel in euros, that will signal the end of America’s role as the greatest nation on the face of the earth.

World leaders have long accepted America’s President as the most powerful man in the world, and that America was the dictator of how world communities should live. The high point of many leaders’ experience was their visit to The White House. Now that President Barack Obama is in office this is not the time to back away from that principle, however, it always has been a little over the top. We can’t all be Americans, nor do we all want to live as Americans do. The world is not wired like that, but to live in peace and harmony with our neighbours in democracy is not a bad thing.

Add to those things much needed stability. There are certain countries whose citizens are legend for not wanting to change their ways. They prefer to just go along doing things as they have always done, and they resist change with all their might. The promoters of the new way cannot understand why a person would actually choose to continue to do things that require more effort rather than to work smarter and easier. It’s all about what you understand. That’s why hardware stores still sell push mowers and hand scythes. When your bank manager was still at his or her desk fifty years on, that was a very good thing. There was trust, knowledge and stability between customer and banker. Now bank managers are rotated routinely and banks are mere institutions without hearts or soul. To add to that they have been at the forefront of making mistakes and helping their clients make mistakes. In one country the government has given banks the power to call in their mortgage clients, to whom they gave a mortgage of more than 100%. Now they require more collateral from the client. Like what do they have in mind?

Yes Chicken Little, the sky is falling. There is nothing that is certain other than death and taxes. Many of my generation did not believe in God, but they did believe in General Motors and Lehman Bros. Now what?

Copyright © 2009 Eugene Carmichael

I'm Shrinking!

I’m perfectly aware that we all shrink as we grow older. As a man I expect to have problems with my shirt size as it is at present, and my suit size, not to mention my waist size. One man said that he has not had a problem with his waist size throughout his entire life. What he really meant was that he is still wearing a size 35 but it isn’t around his waist. The bigger he got the lower he wore his pants in the front.

What has got me to thinking about shrinking is my shoe size. I expect everything else to shift around and about, but I expect my shoe size to remain permanent. Well, it isn’t, dammit! I have bought shoes recently in size 42, which is small for a man anyway. Buying shoes in the Winter is deceptive because of those heavy socks. As a result size 42 fit me perfectly. However, Summer’s here and I have to put away the chunky socks and my shoes don’t fit me any more.

This is so depressing! I’m getting smaller as my voice has gone up an octave. What a pain in the butt this is. I feel I’m losing my virility on the one hand while on the other hand I feel charged up and capable of doing most reasonable things.

I thought I had better take a look at the facts on shrinking while aging. I wish I hadn’t started now because the facts are horrible. It seems we’re in growth mode until at the most around age 30, and that is where we top out. We may get to hold the line for a short time, but once the rot sets in its all downhill after that.

The Baltimore Longitudinal Study says that by age 70, most men are about 1.2 inches shorter than we were at age 20. For women it is even worse as they lose about two inches. The culprit is loss of bone density as we naturally lose calcium and other minerals. Women suffer more than men, hence women are often prescribed calcium supplements at menopause. Brittle bone syndrome attacks women more so than men as well, so hip fractures are something that women have to be more cautious of.

To add to the misery our facial bone structures are sucked in leaving our skin to sag. Many people have relied on the old Nip ‘n Tuck to see them through, but the process is relentless. Unfortunately, in a world where beauty accounts for so much the loss of her beauty is particularly cruel. However, there is one area where women score rather well.

Our brains stop growing just after we pass through our teenage years, but every parent will swear it happens immediately we enter those years, and we actually lose weight and volume of our brains at a rate of about 10 percent a decade, according to a U.S. study. Apparently most men’s brains undergo a dramatic change between ages 60 and 64 in shrinkage, however, women’s brains stay about the same.

Australian researchers tell us that size really doesn’t matter; that we retain all of our mental strength regardless. The loss of memory has more to do with chemical interactions. Well, that’s a relief! That still leaves us with the fact that we do shrink as we age and there’s no putting off the day for that to happen.

I’m still pissed about my shoe size. Man that’s confusing!

Copyright © 2009 Eugene Carmichael

When Life Doesn’t Disappoint

The one thing that is guaranteed is that life will hand us disappointments, whether we are ready for them or not. Our challenge is to accept them with more grace.

Sometimes, however, life does not disappoint, and this is about one of those times. Of course, as you know I am a Columnist. I think that is a very glorified title that I am giving myself, but I can do so, and so I have. I’m sure there are those who would scoff at that, but for the time being, and for the sake of argument let us let it lie. The point I’m clumsily trying to make is about the lonely life of a Columnist. In many ways it’s similar to broadcasters who talk into a microphone and a camera hoping that there is someone out there listening and watching.

From time to time we are assured when someone gives us feedback, usually because they disagree with something we’ve said, but you will be surprised to know that we live for such moments. At least it’s confirmation that someone is listening or reading our stuff.

The act of writing a column is very liberating because we are able to let go of our views and opinions. It’s not at all the same thing to be a news reporter, and those who do both will agree. The wonderful thing about the Internet and blogging is that anyone can do it.

Over the years those of us who blog or write columns for newspapers hope that we gather loyal friends to whom we make sense. The same is the case for us writers in that we also have our favourite contributors. We get to learn their style, and we can tell from the tone of a particular column whether they were having an up or down day when it was written. Without the contributor knowing we make friends who we sometimes disappoint, or make very happy when our views match theirs.

However, there is a danger to this process. As in every case where we admire the work of someone from afar, the real person might be a total turnoff. I have come to learn this personally because I have met some of my favourite film personalities, and boy was I disappointed in most of their private personalities.

My favourite Columnist of all time is a young woman who came to Spain from England about six years ago. She suddenly splashed onto the newspaper scene as “An English Girl in Spain”, which is the title of her Column in the Costa Blanca Group of publications. I recall reading her first contribution and thinking how fresh her style and opinions were, and I have stayed with her column ever since.

She has told us a lot about herself and the trials and tribulations of her life. We knew she was very much in love with her Spanish boyfriend, and then she told us when that came to an end and I was saddened for her. She told us about her Santiago de Compestelo challenge and I ached for her as she came to the near impossible mountain pass in the devil’s weather. Now, she is missing her family and feeling a bit guilty about living here in Spain when they are not exactly next door.


Then, suddenly one day I was introducing myself to this lovely young woman who responded that her name was Joanna Cruickshank, and I could not believe my ears. Without warning I had come face to face with my idol, and I was suitably gobsmacked. After a bit of a chat it occurred to me that here was a lovely young woman with both feet on the ground and her head on straight with a bright future. I also didn’t realise that I had been giving her words on paper a voice that I could hear as I read them. Her actual voice is different to what I imagined in a much better way.

Through this medium I simply want to encourage her to keep up the good work. I’m sure sometimes she finds herself tired and doubtful of whether she should continue. The fact is that “An English Girl in Spain” is the first thing I read in the Costa Blanca/Costa Levante News, and life would degrade without it.

Now, I’m wondering how my voice sounds to you.

Copyright (c) 2009 Eugene Carmichael

Growing Old, or Simply Growing Older

Is Age simply a Number?

The headline read “Percy reaches 102”. For all we knew they might have been talking about his cricket score. The picture showed three people standing, a young girl, and to her left a mature gentleman of about 70, and to his left a younger man. The man in the middle was Percy who had celebrated his 102nd birthday with a conventional party that included dancing, in which he took part.

His name is Percy Miller, who was born in Plymouth, England in 1907. In that same year Katherine Hepburn, Laurence Olivier, and John Wayne were also born. They have all passed on, as we are all aware.

The National Union of Women’s Sufferage Societies held their first ever major march, that was dubbed The March in the Mud. Maria Montessori opened her first Montessori School in Rome promoting her own brand of teaching that has endured unto today.

Of special interest is the fact that 1907 in America, and to a lesser degree around the world was a period of great economic uncertainty. In fact, in the United States it was called “The Panic of 1907”. It started with an earthquake in San Francisco that went on to shake the entire U.S. economy and its effect was felt around the world. The cast of characters was the same, being the banks and Wall Street.

For those being born today we should take particular note of the fact that for so many people the actuarial life expectancy tables have so often been proved wrong. In the case of our Percy, when he was born it was expected that he would live to a ripe old age of 47, the same age in Bermuda when I was born in 1939. I don’t know about Percy, but I took it seriously and hurried out of school and got married at a criminally young age and brought our two children into the world by the time we were eighteen.

The Costa Blanca News reported some startling facts about Percy Miller. He was married to Joyce, his wife of 56 years and they had two children and four grandchildren. He lives independently with the help of family and friends. He loves to dance although it’s not likely for him to dance with women of his own age group, as there are none. He was still playing cricket at age 70, which is no big deal. I’m 70 and I can do that…badly. However, at age 90 he abselled down a cliff, something I’m not likely to ever do, except by accident, and something else that I definitely won’t be doing is walking from Jalon to Parcent, an inland route of 5.4 kilometres to celebrate his 100th birthday.

He was asked the inevitable question, to what do you owe your long life? His response was that he always has a glass of orange juice in the morning and a glass of wine at night. Rumour had it that he drank a bottle of whisky a day, and it was wondered what his doctor thought. He denied the rumour, but in any event his doctor is dead, so he can jolly well do as he pleases.

To that question I would have answered for him that he owes his long life to luck….very good luck for having outlived all his friends and enemies. First thing to do to live long is to avoid the Army, Navy and Air Force. They say that if you join up with them you can be all that you can be. I’ve always interpreted that as being dead. Luck was on his side in those cases, keeping him safely sidelined.

He has lived through all manner of crisis’, and even a period of virtual world peace, except for local conflict. For those of us I hope we have the opportunity to live to celebrate our 100th birthdays, just to see how this crazy out-of-control world turns out. However living to such an age also infers quality of life, and if we get to emulate Percy by retaining our motor functions and capabilities we will be very lucky.

The thing to remember is that as we are living longer it might be a good idea to take good care of ourselves. For instance, how wonderful do you think it might be to do as Percy did and Drive his Own Car to the photo shoot! Now that’s a life well worth having lived. Don’t you think?

Copyright © 2009 Eugene Carmichael

The Big Bang Noise of Peace!

Have a NiceDay!

I give as an example the activities of children playing in a seperate room from yourself, who then suddenly go quiet. You will rush into the room to see what’s the matter.
Now you know exactly what I mean by silence producing sometimes the loudest noise of all.

I have written before of my obnoxious neighbours who start with their noisy lifestyle from the moment they awaken. Sometimes the sun has not arisen and we can hear them screaming at one another. Periodically, all is absolutely quiet at their house and that leads me to look over the balcony to see if they have all (hopefully) died.

You will no doubt have your own examples of having been startled by sudden silence. My favourite story is that of the barking dog who carried on non-stop because he didn’t like being tethered on a chain. When a complaint was made to the owners they suggested that if the dog’s barking disagreed with the neighbours they simply should not listen to it.

That sounds to me like the same choice that people who live alongside a busy road have. The sound of traffic will be constant, so you have to learn to block it out. But what if the road were suddenly closed, how then would the residents cope with so much silence? Would they be put constantly on edge fearing the return of the roar at any minute? I presume they would enjoy their moment of peace so much that the coming loss of it will be unbearable.

Such was the case of Peace, in the sense of war and peace. I do recall only one temporary period of time during which the world was all but completely at peace. With the exception of a few very local disputes there were no major threats hanging over our existence. The Cold War had ended, The Berlin Wall came down, the major powers were talking, and the Pentagon was asking whether they should be developing major weapons of destruction.

Russia and The United States were destroying their own missiles, and the entire world exhaled. In a U.S. Senate session the question was asked that if the U.S. continued to stockpile warheads, against whom might they one day have to be launched. What enemies did America have? The answer came back, that America didn’t have any such enemies at that time.

That was one of those perfect day type situations. You know the type I mean where the temperature is perfect for the beach and the picnic. There’s not a cloud in the sky and life is beautiful and lazy and grand. Anything at all can shatter that fragile picture, and when it does it will come as a surprise.

Well, the picture did shatter, and the image was so long ago, that by comparison with all the bad things that are happening and that have happened since, it seems that we never did have such a wonderful interlude. Part of the actual noise that broke the peace was 9/11, and I wonder how many people looked at that with a sense of outrageous normality. The real noise had returned so it was now O.K. to breath regularly. We knew the peace was all just an illusion.

Copyright © 2009 Eugene Carmichael

World Financial Crisis Solved

World Financial Crisis Solved ! Wall Street off the hook.

You’ve all seen the e-mail making the rounds with the above title. I really enjoyed it because it all seemed so simple. In case you haven’t actually seen it this is what it says: To fix America’s economic problems government should not give so much money to the banks, who seem to be putting it into their pockets in the form of what they call a bonus, instead government should do the following:

There are about forty million people over 50 in the work force. Government should pay each person $1 million in severance pay to take early retirement. That would create 40 million jobs.
Those people must buy a new American car. That would fix the American auto industry.
They must either buy a new house or pay off their mortgage. That would solve the housing crisis.
If more money is required have all members in Congress and their constituents actually pay their income taxes.

Sounds great! What’s right about it, and what’s wrong with it.
Firstly, as always, the devil is in the details.

Take those 40 million people who are now struggling to save up for their retirement and to pay off their mortgages. A windfall of one million dollars in most cases would go a long way to resolving their concerns. Once they have retired, hopefully some of that money could go towards starting their own business that could become an employer. Of course, there will be some people who would actually lose money by taking the million, but overall, it would probably meet with favour by a majority.

The American auto industry is perhaps the largest employer, so to increase demand for their products by 40 million units would in itself put a great many people back to work. Of course, many of those same workers would have been beneficiaries of the payout, so younger people would go into their vacant jobs. So far, so good!

Those forty million people would have to buy a house or retire their mortgages. For many people this would be a reprieve from near death as they are losing their homes because they have lost their job. This solution would bring lots of new workers into the market to meet the demand. Even those people who have a home that is paid for would be required to buy a new home, so presumably they could do so, then later when the country is stable they could sell it in the normal manner.

These steps seem solid to me, except that America’s unemployed number far fewer than 40 million. To make up the additional workers needed America could always bring in Mexicans, who are going to come anyway.

Hopefully, such a programme would address the toxic assets on the books of the lending institutions, but if it did the question then becomes whether the bankers will go back to their old habits and give too much credit too freely, in the interest of their bonus’.

The major problem with this idea is that it feel socialist, and in America that just does not sell. You can “give” as much money to the banks as you wish, and not all will be recovered. We speak of giving, but government thinks in terms of investment, however a lot of money will be lost in the process. The other thing that’s wrong is that 40 million times one million dollars is so much money my calculator has just had a heart attack.

Copyright © 2009 Eugene Carmichael

Modern Day Super Hero?

A New kind of Super Hero


They say that the President of the United States is the most powerful man on earth. Some people would choose to debate this, but there is no doubt that whatever he or she decides to do does have an effect on just about the whole world, so that is a lot of power. However, it’s not simply a case of having the power, but how it is used that is important.

I finally got around to watching the film “Hancock” starring Will Smith. This is a very unusual role for him as he acts out the part of Super Hero, a different kind of Superman. He has a definite public relations problem in the film, but it got me to thinking about super heroes, and what we expect from them.

Essentially, we expect our ideal hero to be on the side of good. They are supposed to be a part of the solution, coming to the rescue in the nick of time. No challenge is too great, or too small, and everybody looks up to them. Most of our super heroes exists only in our imagination, however President Obama is very real, and so far he seems to be filling out the criteria very well.

He has taken on an impossible task, that of putting the U.S. economy back on the tracks after a derailment unlike at any other time in history, and that would most likely lead to putting things right with the rest of the world. He has taken some bold steps to turn things around. The U.S. was in very bad shape when he stepped into office on January 20th, 2009. President George W. Bush drew the short end of the stick. It was on his watch that 9/11 happened, and when the result of too much easy credit came home to roost.

I thought that he, together with Dick Cheney as Vice-President, and Donald Rumsfeld as Secretary of Defence responded quite rationally by striking back at the sponsors of the 9/11 atrocity in Afghanistan. However, they then went a step too far by attacking Iraq on a pretext, and that led to a great deal of criticism worldwide, and America’s image fell off a cliff.

Following President Obama’s G-20 involvement and stops throughout Europe a poll was conducted among foreigners asking whether his performance had caused them to revise their opinion favourably towards the United States, and a staggering 91% said yes. This is no small achievement and bodes well for the future.

President Obama has gone on to tackle the thorny issue of Cuba, a thorn in the side of the U.S. for over 50 years. No other president would even touch the subject, but just a little loosening of the icy grip has brought forth from the Castro brothers the surprising statement that they are prepared to talk, and everything is on the table. At the least Cuba has been a perpetual embarrassment to the U.S. so to bring about a warming of relations would be a welcome thing. After all there are very real people who have been suffering as a result of the intransigence of the leaders.

Then came the Summit of the Americas in Trinidad and Tobago, and Mr. Big Mouth, Hugo Chavez, who is on record as having said that he thought President Obama was stupid was overheard now to say that he would welcome a friendship between himself and Mr. Obama.

So far, so good!

This is the kind of real super hero we can all believe in. I’m sure that even those people who still can’t digest the fact that he is their president are probably pausing to reflect on the reasons they hate him so much, and are finding that the list is shrinking.

So, as goes the President so goes the country, and in effect the entire world. At least everybody is talking, except that lone wolf in North Korea, but hopefully he will come around. His people are dying to have him get on board the Joy Express.

I wish President Obama continued success, and very small and inconsequential errors because he does not walk on water. Let’s stay tuned for the second 100 days.

Copyright © 2009 Eugene Carmichael

The Times in which we Live

Over a recent span of time I have become engrossed in survivability in times of war and peace. One thing rings very clear in my mind, and it is this: we are all products of our time. Our experience will de dictated by those times, and in spite of our individual ambitions it will be the circumstances into which we are born that will ultimately determine the degree of quality, and to a large measure the quantity of the life that we will lead.

This was not always obvious to me, although I was born in 1939, a time of war for the western world. From my earliest memories I have lived in a period of rising expectations, a very privileged position to have had.

I began kindergarten at age five. The U.S. Navy and U.S. Air Force occupied their bases on my island. It was from these personnel that I first tasted chewing gum and chocolate, and I was told tales of life in America. The war ended and the government decided to develop tourism to Bermuda as its main economic pillar.

As U.S. dollars continued to roll into our economy the value of our little piece of real estate in the Atlantic began to grow and the benefit was felt throughout the entire island.
I never had to serve in the armed forces, and nothing arose to disturb my progress in realising my own ambitions. My life has been my own to live as I have seen fit, and I am the only person responsible for my success in life, or otherwise.

Living in Spain in my retirement has brought all this home to me as I continue to research the history of this country. Any country that has been through a civil war, (in my opinion the very worst kind of war there is), has a very special challenge placed upon its future. Fundamentally, this country went to the polls and elected a government in a spirit of democracy, and that led to more trouble than anyone could have predicted. For many people it led to their very own deaths.

There are certain issues that can erupt within society that draw clear lines with no room for fence sitting. You either support the present government or you don’t. You either support the death penalty or you don’t. The issue of slavery brought a nation to clash against itself and its wounds are still somewhat raw all these years later.

We have avoided war in most cases of disagreement because we have matured as humankind. We have seen how ugly war is and we would rather avoid sinking into that particular hell. However, in some cases as individuals we are simply drawn into conflict, and that is where luck comes into play.

For me, I am very lucky to have been born in Bermuda. My forbearers moved from America to Barbados, and then to Bermuda. Had I been born in America my life’s experience would have been very different. I sat on the sidelines and watched Rev. Martin Luther King, Jr lead the fight for my human rights. I also sat on the sidelines as Barack Obama fought gallantly to move America forward by a quantum step to realise Dr. King’s dream. Had I grown up in America I would have been in the thick of battle, and I would not have had a choice.

Our son has to cope in times of growing hardship and grave social danger. The very large question that is unanswered at the moment is whether there is a wall into which he will slam that will turn his life into a living hell. Our hope for him is that he will always have options for growth and happiness, and that he will have the wisdom to make the right choices. Far too many young people squander their choices until they find it’s too late to recover, and that they are the authors of their own misfortune.

The other big negative is that we should expect to see stress related illness affect more young people than ever. We already have seen a dramatic rise in murders committed by the very young.

In the times in which we are now living, being young might just be the greatest weight of all to bear.

Copyright © 2009 Eugene Carmichael

One Solo Crane

Lonely Crane

Once upon a time, not very long ago our skyline was a very busy place. One could have turned 360 degrees and everywhere you would have seen construction cranes dotting the horizon. You could have been forgiven for thinking that they were tv antennas. Here in Spain, as a measure of how hard the economy has fallen our skyline is all but bereft of the familiar sight of those giants standing watch over us.

The building boom that began ahead of the change to the euro gathered pace and had the beneficial effect of taking all those unemployed people off the streets. Spain had never been so safe for instead of breaking into homes men have had legitimate work.

Then, a little Building Society in England when bust, leaving depositors lining up at its doors demanding their money. Little did anyone know that that was the thin edge of the wedge. Bankers have been quick to point fingers at the United States, declaring that the problems started there. Certainly the scope of the crisis there is enormous, but how did it involve institutions around the world?

The construction industry was the engine that drove Spain hard. Spaniards came to realize benefits they could not have dreamed of. Suddenly everyone was driving a top of the line car, with summer and winter homes. The top jobs were reserved for locals, and the ladies were turned out in only the best.

Pop! Bang!! Boom!!!

That was the sound the Spanish balloon made as it burst, making for the worst statistic within Europe. So far, four million are out of work. Many foreigners who came to get a piece of the pie have simply returned home. However, those illegal would-be immigrants still come in droves hoping against hope that Spain holds a better life them. A few do succeed and the word gets back home and that brings even more to place an ever-heavier burden on social services. Somehow the word needs to get to Africa that there really isn’t anything better here for them. The special shame is that so many lose their lives along the way in vain.

As I write this the downward spiral continues at an increasing pace. The knock-on effect is taking its toll as one after another companies are forced to close. One way we know when things are on an upward spiral is by seeing the new shops and restaurants and bars that open offering new and exotic experiences. Fancy design furniture shops; travel agencies send people farther afield, and fashions soar in their imagination. Those things are gone now, or well on their way out.

I passed a young woman sitting on a doorstep recently. I have never seen such despair up close as she showed me. She looked up and our eyes met and I was shaken by what I saw. I have no real idea of what her problem was. It need not have been money, or even the effects of illegal drugs, I only know that I have been seriously affected. I think she was saying with her eyes that she wanted to die, there and then.

It’s very difficult to say how long these sad times might last. There is so much over inventory in ready-to-move-in houses that have absolutely no buyers, and the promise of possible buyers recedes with every new person laid off. Now would perhaps be a good time for young people to consider joining the military, and the government might consider an aggressive programme of road and bridge building. The traditional cornerstones of the economy are in serious trouble, and the day that they emerge into the light will probably be a long way into the future.

Copyright © 2009 Eugene Carmichael

More Bad News

Crimes against all the women of the World

Last week I wrote about Josef Fritzl, the monster of Austria, who dislikes being thought of as a monster for having enslaved his daughter for 24 years and keeping her as his sex slave. You will recall that he fathered 7 children with her, against her will. It seems that although I said that I was disgusted by his actions, I neglected to say how ashamed that made me feel as a man, that one of of "us" could be so low. Well, unfortunately, even before the ink had dried I got another chance to express my revulsion and to make up for my omission.

Austria may be glad to have some company in its misery, but Colombia, South America, have now reported that they have arrested their own monster for allegedly sexually abusing his daughter over a very long time, and in the process he has fathered eight children with her. The daughter is now 35 years of age, and her oldest child is 19, a shared fact with the Fritzl case.

The man, speaking in his own defence, said that the woman is not his biological daughter, but rather he and his now deceased wife adopted her. His daughter is adamant that he is her biological father.

Let me be clear: whether adopted or biological, there is no difference in so far as this crime is concerned. It is heinous and beyond the acceptable or understandable actions of man. The man who molests his own children is scum. He gives up his right to call himself a man, because other men cannot understand him, nor apologise for him. Indeed, he can no longer say that he is a decent human being. He moves down beyond the bottom dwellers. He cannot say that he lives with them because they have done nothing to be linked with him.

These kinds of actions, no matter how many more come to the surface, are so far outside respectable human behaviour that the individuals who commit them deserve our absolute scorn.

Much time and angst has been spent in trying to come up with an appropriate form of punishment/treatment to deal with these cretins. When last I wrote I said that I simply did not know what was the correct thing to do. Well, I now have a better idea.

Most men are motivated by our sexual urges. That’s how we are wired. We work hard to impress the women we find attractive, and all our efforts drive us to sexually mate with the women we find who inspire us. The kids and the mortgage and stressful job come as a surprise. I’m assuming that these men who take their daughters do so because of an inability to find satisfaction elsewhere. Should that be the case I have to assume there will be other cases in the future.

Rape, imprisonment, abduction, already have their punishment guidelines. What we need to do is beef up the response to this sort of incest. I am certain that within the boundaries of decent society’s conscience we can tolerate treating the attacker by having his penis reduced to a mere stump so that it can no longer be used for penetration purposes. Such an operation can be carried out with all proper conditions, and most likely doctors would not have a problem with it. After all, it does not contravene the Hippocratic oath to do no harm, as the doctor will be safeguarding society and the individual himself.

I also believe that the men themselves would possibility agree to such a procedure. The one thing that is apparent is that when found out these men go into a super sense of shame. We saw how Josef Fritzl hid his face, even though it was already so well known. Some people who commit certain types of crime actually hope to be caught and stopped.

And now, a word to the women of the world: The vast majority of men are decent people who are as outraged as you must be by the telling of these tales. We do not understand such individuals who commit such outrage against women, nor can we condone in any way their actions. We find ourselves constrained by the natural justice guidelines, beyond which we will not go. This is not a time to lose faith and to think that the world is going to end in a cesspool of depravity because all the men have gone mad. However, what this does tell us is that there are a few men who are capable of taking their sickness into new frontiers. There would be nothing wrong with bearing that in mind and acting accordingly.

What do you think?

Copyright © 2009 Eugene Carmichael

I am Not a Monster

Beautiful Salzburg, Austria

Josef Fritzl does not like being described as a Monster. You will recall that he is the “gentleman” from Austria who took his own daughter hostage and enslaved her as his sex object. He held her against her will for 24 long years in a downstairs sealed apartment where he fathered seven children with her.

One of the children needed urgent medical care at an early age, however he was adamant that there would be no medical intervention, so the child died. For this he was charged with murder.

Because of the nature of the offences allegedly committed he was further charged with numerous acts of rape, too numerous to count, and with incest.

Perhaps Mr. Fritzl is correct, the word monster does seem tame under the circumstances.

In my opinion, for any father to have sexual relations with his own child is to qualify him as a monster of the highest degree. I cannot even imagine what goes through a person’s mind to make him think that would be justified. For any female to experience being treated with such disdain and disrespect is not something that any man can imagine, even those who commit the offence. The exception to this is when it’s a man on the receiving end from another man.

When the aggressor is her own father, the one person upon whom she is supposed to be able to count on for protection, she surely must believe that this world is putrid beyond belief.

There are some other elements to this story that are even more important. I wonder what was in the mind of Mrs. Fritzl. Oh yes! There is a Mrs. Fritzl. As widely reported, her name is Rosemarie and she is approximately 69 years of age. She lived in the upstairs part of the very same house under which her daughter was being held for all those years. She was told by her husband that their daughter had run away from home and joined a cult. Then he showed up with three of his children/grandchildren for her to care for, explaining that they were her daughter’s for whom the daughter could not care for.

In researching this story, incredibly other media have printed the names of all the players. I disapprove of that. I think that it is insensitive to the burden that the children/grandchildren already have to bear, so I will refrain from doing so.

Many people absolutely refuse to believe that the wife had no idea of what was going on. However, it should be borne in mind that he did not intend that she know. The bunker itself was actually under the backyard, rather directly below the house, so the sounds of crying children were adequately muffled.

His daughter was 19 when he lured her into what was to become her home for the next 24 years. She is now 42 and very deeply troubled. I try to imagine what his rape of her was like that first time, and my mind shuts down. I just can’t go there. And all those subsequent times when he entered the bunker for sex. I can hear her pleading “Daddy, please, not again!”

The ages of the children are as follows: Girl, 19, boy, 18, girl, 16, girl, 14, boy, 12, boy, 5. Three of the children had never seen daylight since they were born.

There are two things that disturbs me about the children: How will they cope, especially since everybody in Austria knows who they are, and they all bear this man’s evil seed. I suppose that they could be given social counselling and transferred to another country and given new identities, but there is still the matter of the evil seed that they carry, and they will all know about how they came into the world. How does one rise above such a horrific beginning?

Fritzl was once an honourable man in the eyes of those who knew him, but now that the truth is out he felt the need to hide his face. I imagine that one of the worst punishments for anyone to suffer is to lose their honour. Once it’s gone, it’s gone forever.

So, Herr Fritzl, you may not think you’re a monster but in the eyes of the world you are the ultimate monster. As for me, all I know is that you thoroughly disgust me. Your crimes are against humankind because they are crimes against your own family. I have no idea as to what would be the proper punishment for you within the law. I note that there is a suggestion that you be jailed for the rest of your miserable life, and that you be given treatment. This outraged me until I remembered that treatment can take many forms.

On its face Austria is a place of breathtaking beauty and culture. Everything seems to be in place, and it seems to work like the finest clock. However, Austria needs to look inwards and ask itself whether it is reasonable that it gave to the world, apart from Josef Fritzl, Wolfgang Priklopil who abducted Natascha Kampusch whom he held for eight years, but not always underground or even indoors; and it also gave us as its president Kurt Waldheim, a “former” nazi. He also served for five years as UN Secretary-General. (I can hear your breath stop.)

The worst thing to date that Austria has given to the world is one of its sons, Adolf Hitler. For this it should forever be in an apologetic state to all of humankind. Were it not for the fact that it also gave us Arnold Schwarzenegger we might have a totally dismal view of this country.

Copyright © 2009 Eugene Carmichael

Australia

Australia-The Land Down Under

It’s an amazing thing that in spite of the fact that Australia is so large we could fit all of Europe within it, and still have space left over, I hardly know anything about it. However, lately news from Australia seems to be a regular feature. I have always regarded that country in the same sense as the downstairs neighbours. You know they are there, but they can be ignored.

As a young person the only thing I knew about the country was that they would not admit any people of colour. A government minister from my country who was black, had to attend a Commonwealth conference that was held in Australia. In order for him to be admitted he was given a certificate naming him as an “Honorary White”. He was mortified, and he used his time for speech to castigate the government for their policies.

From my viewpoint at that time, I considered that any country that was that stupid was probably also very dangerous. I resolved that they would never have to worry about me coming to visit. That was a long time ago. Since then, my wife, who is British with a sister living in Australia, took our son for a visit so that he could make his acquaintance with his cousins. He fell in love with the place, and now, two years later, at the age of 18, he has gone back on his own accord for a year’s work/study. He could not have chosen a more event filled year to be there.

There have been killer floods in the north, out of control fires in Victoria, (that is located to the north of Melbourne;) and a typhoon that has ravaged the east coast. I have always had the impression that the country was a very dangerous place. There are creatures on the loose that can rip a man to shreds. Those are the women of Australia, commonly known as Sheila’s. The animals are even more vicious.

I was very touched by the dramatic impact of the fires that took the lives of some 200 persons and destroyed so much property. To be told that some of those fires were deliberately set out of mischief is a body blow that is felt from even this distance.

I must admit that I have mellowed somewhat as the country has changed a great deal. However, I would really have to be desperate to go there. Our son booked his own flight and bought his own ticket. We live in Spain and I thought he would fly to London, then on to Australia across Africa with perhaps a stop-over in Indonesia. He chose to fly London direct to Los Angeles, then direct to Sydney, before changing planes to fly to Melbourne. That was the long way round, although cheaper. He sat on airplanes for more than thirty hours, plus he had waiting times of another ten hours. Only a young person with stamina could do that. As I say, I would have to really be desperate to go there via any route.

As far as I can tell, Australia is a dream world for a student taking a gap year for adventure. He has gone there for the purpose of developing his independence, so we are not getting blow-by-blow accounts of his trials and tribulations, but we do understand that he is fully engaged and enjoying the experience. We believe that he is meeting up with other young people who are backpacking and that he is learning a great deal from the university of life.

The world has changed so much and continues to do so before our eyes. To be young, free and adventurous in this age must be a wonderful thing. As for me, my sense of “get up and go” has long gone.

Copyright © 2009 Eugene Carmichael

The Lowest of the Low

I have been following a case through the courts that is especially instructive as to the depths one person can sink in their inhumanity to man. This is not an example from a war torn area. Places like Germany, the United States, South Africa, Zimbabwe, Eastern Europe, Iraq, and various other parts of Africa are replete with examples of how depraved humans can be, but this is a story from a wealthy country at peace.

The facts are as follows: A distinguished gentlemen has lived to reach the age of 100, while maintaining his independence. However, his ability to get around on his own was diminishing, and his capability of looking after himself really required that he be given some help. An agency was contracted to send a caregiver. They chose a 47-year-old female who held herself out as a family person and a devout Christian.

She began her care of the gentleman, but after only a few months it was noticed that his spending habits had altered. He had been receiving a pension of $1,400 per month, against which he spent $1,300. However, he had a savings account of $110,000 that he was not touching. Perhaps he should have been finding the odd thing or two to amuse himself, but as he had outlived all his friends and relatives, except one, who lived in another country, he had no-one to share his life with.

A neighbour noticed that the caregiver had moved in with her client, bringing her family with her. The elderly gentleman had been moved from the part of the house that he loved, the part with the view of the sea, and was placed in a small room at the back of the house.

A brand new car appeared at the house, and on the surface he appeared to be reasonably happy. He did not complain when the relative called to check on him, however, the neighbour sensed that something was awry. A call was placed to the relative suggesting that they might like to look into the current state of affairs.

What that investigation uncovered was the following: The caregiver soon discovered that the old man had a very healthy balance at the bank, so she convinced her client that it would be cheaper for him to hire her direct. She resigned from the agency, thereby excluding them from monitoring her activities; then she convinced him to give her Power-of-Attorney, although she was neither an attorney nor a blood relative.

Armed with that document she completely took over his life. She told him what he could or could not do. She made him give up his preferred space in the house, and she spent his money as though it were her own for personal things for herself and her family. When she was caught his account had been depleted by $90,000.

Adjectives fail me. I can only say that a special place is reserved for this woman and her husband in hell. To steal from someone such as this gentleman is to show such utter disrespect to all seniors, and in particular to herself. I’m thinking of appropriate names for her, but I will keep them to myself. You can think of your own list.

As disturbing as the actions of this very depraved person are, I am upset with others who should have stood up for the gentleman. Firstly, the Agency who sent the caregiver must have seen that her resignation meant that a private deal had been struck between their client and the caregiver. That is one of the fundamental protections that they must surely be responsible to guard against. In my opinion, they should be held responsible for his losses.

Secondly, she applied a Power-of-Attorney over the assets of someone for whom she had no basis to be granted such power. Perhaps were she his next-of-kin a good case might have been made, but under those circumstances it would have been far better for his attorney to have held that power so that any requests for disbursements could have been monitored. Instead, the law firm actually complied. They did not have to do so. Instead, if he insisted they could have referred the matter to the department of Social Services.

Finally, when a citizen reaches a certain age, I always thought that the Department of Social Services takes a particular interest in their welfare. It seems to me that they should look into the living structure of such senior citizens to ensure that they are not being taken advantage of by the unscrupulous. Apparently this is not happening.

There were three hurdles to the caregiver being able to abuse her client. She crossed them all without any problem. They are all in one way or another in the business of providing care to the community, especially those who are not able to fend for themselves adequately. They all failed miserably! May the caregiver rot in hell!

Copyright © 2009 Eugene Carmichael

Bad Decisions

I have been watching a series by National Geographic that recreates the consequences of bad decisions taken by individuals. The individuals themselves usually relate the stories, so we can say that they are lucky to have survived their own stupidity to talk about it.

It never fails to amaze me that we do things that we realize at the time are stupid and harmful to ourselves, but we do them anyway. I have done my fair share of stupid things, (nothing actually illegal) and as I view such stories I have to say I’m very glad it wasn’t me who was the subject of the presentation.

Usually the events involve the police, customs, or rescue services, or all of the above. I am moved to write this as I hope it might help some young person. The latest story involved a young man in Miami (USA) who fell in love with a cute young girl of seventeen who said that she was married and the victim of an abusive husband. She approached our young man in a tearful state bearing a cut lip, saying that her husband had beaten her. She was never going to go back to him, but she had no idea where she was going to stay.

Our hero came to the rescue by offering to let her stay with him. It developed that she was a cocaine addict who always had enough for herself and a friend or two. (Clue No. 1.)

He fell madly in love with her and eventually she said that she had been made an offer to fly to Mexico to bring back cocaine for a price, but she needed someone to come with her to watch her back. He said no way, but eventually he agreed with the stipulation that he will not carry any drugs himself.

Once they arrived they were met by their contacts who restricted their movements and ensured that they were dependent on their hosts for money and accommodation. Then, in a surprise move the hosts said that they wanted the girl to leave a couple of days ahead of him to limit suspicion. (Clue No. 2.)

Along the way she was seen to speak with certain people with more familiarity than that of complete strangers, and that did puzzle him a bit. (Clue No. 3.)

She left but didn’t call him when she got back to the United States. The drug dealers suddenly came to his room in a very angry mood demanding to know where she was. They say that she took off without the drugs, so he will have to take the drugs himself. He very reluctantly does so, and the last security officer he had to pass discovered that he was carrying contraband and he was arrested.

I have worked as a customs agent with the specific task of busting drug runners. I want to offer a bit of advice to any person who might be thinking about doing something as stupid as smuggling drugs.

“The thing that you are now getting around to thinking of doing is something that professional drugs agents have been stopping for a long time.”

In the case of the young man in our story, he was set-up from the start. The girl was paid to recruit naive young men into doing her bidding through getting them to fall in love with her. He should have paid attention to the fact that she always had a stock of cocaine. Where did it come from? How did she afford it?
Based on that fact alone he needed to shake her free. She was trouble with a capital “T”.

He resisted going to Mexico to take part in a smuggling operation because he knew it was a crazy and self-destructive thing to do. So, why did he do it?

He should have paid particular attention to the people whom she had out of earshot conversations with in a familiar manner. Although she said that she had never done anything like that which they were engaged in, she clearly had travelled this route before.

A person who agrees to take drugs through customs is called a mule. Another name for a mule is an ass, a name that is well deserved. I will not betray my oath of office by divulging the specifics of a custom officer’s training, but here are some common sense thoughts. An experienced customs officer can spot a mule from the moment he steps into the airport or dock, or crossing. The suspect might give himself/herself away by nerves and sweat, or be super cool. More than once people have been busted because the officer asked a question, received an answer, paused to consider what was said and asked again.

In the case we are considering our traveller did not even have a carry-on suitcase. The dealers taped six kilos of cocaine to his body so he even had some difficulty in walking. What’s more, they drove him to the airport and dropped him off in plain sight of the departure desks. From the moment he stepped out of that car he was a marked man.

He got through the previous security checks because officials were probably playing a little game with him. They let him get deep within the network so that he felt he could relax, and then they sprung their trap.

While telling his tale he completely missed two points: One, he said again and again, that if only the officer hadn’t actually touched him gently on his back to assist him along he would have gotten away with it. He seemed to think that the officer’s touch was accidental. It wasn’t! Trust me. Secondly, he refused to believe that his girlfriend had betrayed him. He said “There was no way she would have done such a thing!”

Oh Yeah?

He was sentenced to eight years in a very dirty Mexican prison. Anybody still think it might be worth it to smuggle drugs?

Copyright © 2009 Eugene Carmichael